If You’ve Been Avoiding This One Project, You’re Not Alone

If you’ve ever stared at a cracked wall, a cluttered corner, or a long-overdue project and thought, “I should fix that”… but didn’t — you’re in the right place.

Sometimes we avoid things in our home for the same reasons we avoid things in our lives: fear it’ll be too hard, take too long, or open up a mess we’re not ready to deal with.

I get it.

But here’s the truth: healing your heart and healing your home are often part of the same story.

This space isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress, process, and permission to begin again. No judgment. Just a little encouragement to pick up the tools—literal or emotional—and take your next small step.

I watched Ellen, one of our housecats, stare at the sliver of space between the fridge and wall late one night. Thinking she was alerting me to a bug- her normal prey- you can imagine both our surprise when a lizard popped out from the loosely capped off stove pipe poking just out past the sheetrock and tried to make his final escape.

Removing that pipe and patching the wall had been on the “list” for quite a long time but I avoided it because, one, it was hidden by the refrigerator and two, I was afraid the repair would be more complicated than I was prepared for. Turns out chasing a lizard around the house was the more complicated part that I was totally not prepared for.

Thankfully, with my yelling and Ellen’s pouncing we managed to stun the thing enough for my husband to wake up, swoop in and finally sweep it out the back door. Ellen got lots of treats and I remained thoroughly creeped out cleaning up the lizard’s wayward tail and all the things we had knocked out of place during the battle.

The next day I secured some borrowed sheetrock tools and supplies.

The pain of staying the same was finally worth the pain of change. Or rather the pain of having to evict another lizard out of my kitchen…

How many things do you ignore or overlook in your own home and life because you think doing something about them might be too: expensive/hard/take too long/messy, __________ (fill in your own blank) to change.

We all do it and there is zero judgement here!

It doesn’t have to take a lizard running loose in your house (or some other overwhelming circumstance!) to finally give you the courage to break out your tools and get to work. I’d like to invite you into a slightly less stressful way of relieving some pressure and stress and finding direction in your home and life.

Working through our projects- in home and life can look a little messy at times. Feel unfinished. Maybe even be a little embarrassing to share. We’re so conditioned for instant gratification -the immediate before and after’s on 30 second reels but we can’t blame Instagram because it didn’t really start there…

If you’re like me and loved all the old school HGTV shows like Find and Design, Decorating Cents and Room by Room back in the day then you know they really did us a disservice by making our brains think transformation doesn’t involve as much effort and time as it sometimes does.

Some transformations take an afternoon and you wonder why it took 18 years to get to it. Others take years of saving and maybe some patches along the way.

Our homes see us through these milestones and transformations in life. My current house has been an almost 20 year work in progress. It witnessed my single girl era in my late 20s after the divorce where I made slipcovers for the loveseat and painted most of my furniture black.

It underwent a major rearranging in my 30s as I squeezed my craft and sewing supplies in every extra nook and cranny so that I could welcome my new husband and step son (and their drums!)

And now in my 40s the purposes of the rooms are shifting again since my son married and moved out.

Simultaneously my home has witnessed my internal struggles.

I walked its hallways while working on healing from:

Falling into codependent relationships
Rushing, judging, blaming, ignoring and having zero compassion for myself
Trying to fix my emotions by carefully managing everyone else’s
Stuffing my emotions and soldiering through not realizing the cost of the explosions later on

The four walls of my bedroom held me together when I felt like I was falling apart and knew I needed to change somehow because staying the same felt like it was no longer an option.

Sometimes it’s easy to transition our homes and hearts for the next stage of life and other times it feels like an insurmountable task. Maybe you can relate?

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.”
~ Ephesians 2:10

But we don’t always feel like a masterpiece.

The Proverbs 29 woman makes us resent the ways she has her life together when ours feels like a dumpster fire. And we identify way more with Martha than Mary even though we wish we could figure out what it looked like to be less stressed and let things go.

Can I offer you this piece of comfort that helped me get started on the the project of me: You’re allowed to be both a masterpiece AND work in progress – in your home and in your life so let’s give ourselves some grace, ok?

This learning, practicing and integrating our life lessons, whether it’s new techniques to skim drywall or regulate our nervous systems is a journey, not a one and done destination.

Like mixing in vintage pieces into your modern decor gives depth and interest to your space, so it is when you experiment and incorporate new skills or spiritual practices into your life.

You become transformed and filled and able to pour into others.

“Lasting transformation comes from a vision of life that is so compelling it is impossible to stay where we are.”
~Cyd & Geoff Holsclaw Landscapes of the Soul

So here’s where we start: What’s the ultimate vision you have for your life? What does the highest version of you think? Practice? Feel?

“We are built to think about and get energy from the hope that comes from a bright future.”
~John Townsend

When I first started the work to change my mindset years ago I would take whatever thought I was trying to rewire and make it a graphic for my phone lock screen- I mean what better way to see it multiple times a day..!

Here’s one for you if you’d like, you can download it here.

What’s one project in your home or practice you could incorporate into your life this week that can inch you forward to the YOU that you want to be? I’m right here with you chasing lizards and wiping up drywall dust. You’re not alone, friend.